Tonight’s menu:
Entrée
Crash Test Yummies
An antipasto selection of crashed probes,
punctured tubing, broken o-rings
and expired reagent crisps
Main
Hotline Pasta
A delightful beef ravioli
served in an irritation of
jalapeno sauce, called out with
chilli seeds and a serviceman
Hypertensions Risotto
A tantalising risotto, guaranteed to
raise the blood pressure with its drizzling
of non-working gadgets and questionable results
Taxi Driver Surprise
A vegetable plate delivered by cab
either thirty seconds before or
forty minutes after you order
provided that pressing the swipe card slot activates
the button next to it on the back door
Dessert
Queerlity Crème (“QC”)
Soon to become a signature dish,
a new take on crème caramel using
out-of-range or just plain dregs of
quality control material
wobbling over a caramel custard base
The Desperate Food Thieves Catering Company
“Where your food is really ours”
Patrons are advised that due to unforeseen problems in our kitchens that meals may be delayed indefinitely. Our brand new cook top/washer/dryer/cash register combination oven has more than a few teething problems. The manual that came with it has been written in English, translated from Japanese by a small man in a car boot with very little lighting and whose linguistic skills consist of speaking Korean with a Finnish accent. We apologise for any undue delay in receiving meals, but further advise that the diversion service is still in operation; you may wish to steal the plate next to you. We thank you for your continuing support of the Desperate Food Thieves Catering Company in this, our darkest hour.
No comments:
Post a Comment